What is Happiness?

Happiness: a state of well being and contentment. 

~ Webster's Dictionary

What is happiness? As you can see above is the definition of happiness but what it is really to us? A state of well being and contentment sounds amazing but how often do I actually reach this state? 

These are questions I have been asking myself lately. I know that I am happy in my marriage and my home, but I always seem to be looking past contentment into the great unknown. I am a planner to the core. I make lists about lists and I always had an answer to the question where do you see yourself in 10 years. I know this about myself and I have made countless resolutions to change. To learn to be content and to live in the moment not 10 years from now because reality is that my 10 year plan changes monthly. I think I am scared of contentment because I confuse it with being stagnant and stagnant is not something I want to be. You might even say that's a curse word in my vocabulary. I think this is why I am always planning, always what if-ing my way into a new course of action. 

But not this year! I refuse to spend another year looking forward to 1, 5, or even 10 years from now. I do not want to be the person who looks back on life and regrets that she never did things. Never just lived. I want to relish the unknown while loving the current. So that is what I am going to work on. I am going to work on a true state of happiness with all aspects of my life (marriage, home, career). I know now that happiness does not equal perfection. 

I know I am rambling but this is something I constantly struggle with. I need this resolved and am going to do such. I am going to start by reading Happier at Home by Gretchen Reuben and follow that with her book The Happiness Project. I know this post is sort out of the ordinary but I have been struggling with this lately and needed it out in the open. I needed to confess my lack of contentment to the world in order to start changing it. So thanks for reading and sticking with me.